Anxious love

Merrie+D.+Anne+is+The+Meridian+Daily+advice+columnist+who+addresses+issues+students+may+face.+This+month%2C+she+gives+advice+on+how+to+handle+feelings+of+confusion+and+stress+associated+with+a+busy+spring+schedule.+

photo by Breanna Evans

Merrie D. Anne is The Meridian Daily advice columnist who addresses issues students may face. This month, she gives advice on how to handle feelings of confusion and stress associated with a busy spring schedule.

“Dear Merrie D. Ann,

I’m really bad at love. I’ve been with my partner for a month now. To clarify, this is the first relationship I’ve been in. I’m really insecure about myself and have bad social anxiety. The problem is, they’re very outgoing and I’m not. I have a feeling that they’ll lose interest in me if I’m not more outgoing! How could they date a loser?

Sincerely,

An anxious love”

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Dear anxious love,

I understand love can be scary. Relationships are complicated. Especially if it’s your first. But I think your real problem might be overthinking.

First of all, you talk down on yourself and that’s your first major problem. You have a bad view about yourself, calling yourself a “loser” and saying you’re not outgoing enough–you need to work on your confidence to feel better in your relationship.

Second of all, are you sure you’re dating the right person? Relationships are all about being comfortable. If you aren’t feeling noticed or validated by them, then you need to have a chat with them. 

Most importantly, talk to them. Relationships are not good without communication. It will feel like making lemonade without the sugar, things will get sour and leave a bitter taste. But on a real note, sit them down and tell them how you feel, it can be so releasing.

Another thing a lot of people do is compare their relationships to other people. Do not do this, it’ll cause you to feel that your relationship is inferior and eventually cause a breakup. This goes along with the media. A lot of relationships we see in the media are fake and unrealistic and sort of play into that “is my relationship supposed to be like that?” type of mindset. It’s really unhealthy.

In conclusion, love isn’t easy, so in return take it easy. All love is different, with different situations and different people.